trust in the time of coronavirus

Other than my 52 in 52, I haven’t written much recently. My head has been down, focused on getting through each day with its new challenges and blessings. A pandemic wasn’t in any of our imaginings of spring, I don’t think. But that is where we find ourselves, even if some still somehow believe it’s a hoax. We are sequestered, distanced from loved ones, jobs, activities. Confronted with finding new ways to communicate, maintain music Read More

life after fostering baby a, part 2

*Continued from life after fostering baby a, part 1. At 8 o’clock on Tuesday morning, Baby A was taken to meet his family, introduced to strangers by strangers. And we were not allowed to be there to comfort him, to ease the transition. We were able, however, that afternoon to go meet his new family and eventually bring him home with us for the night. His caseworker’s supervisor met us in the lobby and told Read More

life after fostering baby a, part 1

*For those of you living this with us, you’ll know it’s actually been a couple weeks since Baby A left. However, I chose to keep the timeline intact as if it’s only been five days. It’s been one week since Baby A first met his family. Five days since we last held him, comforted him, kissed him goodbye. Five days of a black hole of information, not knowing how he is, if he’s sleeping well, Read More

saying goodbye to baby a

When Baby A is placed with his adoptive family next week he will have been with us five days shy of nine months. It feels like a lifetime. And in reality, it has virtually  been his entire lifetime, so far. I can only imagine the grief that is to come after we say our final goodbye. So much so, that I can’t find adequate words, any words, to express where my heart is right now. Read More

still holding on to baby a

Baby A is still with us, beyond the first week of June as I dreamed he would be. But there is finally movement toward placement. His new family knows about him. His agency, their agency, is waiting for ICPC approval before they set a placement date. I can only imagine how his family must feel, knowing he’s so close, growing, meeting milestones, while they wait on paperwork and forms. If I was in their shoes, Read More

baby a

We’re now well into April and our foster baby, Baby A, is still with us. At some point along the way he began to feel like my baby, my child. And yet I know I will have to let him go. The heartache I will experience, the loss Big J, Little J, and Little E will feel, brings to mind his birth mother. His birth father if he knows of Baby A’s existence. What must Read More

a rock running a marathon

“What’s that,” you ask? “How can a rock run?” Well, okay, I don’t mean it literally. You see, I am the rock. Or at least I’m supposed to be a rock, according to a parenting book I read not too long ago (okay, apparently it was back in June of last year, but it feels like not long ago). It talked about how our job as parents is to be grounded, stable, to be that Read More

baby brain and the holidays

We’ve had a foster baby with us for a couple of months now. He’s super cute, has a full head of black, curly hair, and has eyes so big you can see him soaking in the world around him. He joined us when he was just a week old so I’ve had interrupted sleep and feel like I’m just coming out of a baby fog. We’ve been living in this dichotomy of falling absolutely in Read More

stuck in midair with Sarah

Welcome, Sarah, to myferriswheel. Thank you for sharing a part of yourself with the world. Sarah Johnson is a wife and mother who homeschools her kids, enjoys arranging flowers, powerlifting, playing the trumpet, and occasionally works as a nurse practitioner in her spare time. You can find her on FB (Craig-Sarah Wilson Johnson) or reach her at presbynurse@gmail.com What specific hurdles into parenthood have you faced and what does your family look like today? When Read More

stuck in midair with Kimberly

Welcome, Kimberly, to myferriswheel. Thank you for sharing a part of yourself with the world. Kimberly is just beginning to emerge from the baby-induced brain-fog of the past seven years, and hopes to someday take up where she left off at www.NewlywedNoLonger.com (truth and grace in marriage) and www.OurSecretThoughts.wordpress.com (the journey from infertility to parenthood). She is also a freelance writer and editor, is blessed with a husband who also is a great father, but Read More